Conversation with Jesus

WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT BEFORE AN OPERATION
Dearest Jesus, do you have any word of encouragement for her operation to avoid this potential cancer spreading, as this is not just having a tooth pulled?

All things work together for good to those that love me. She loves me so all things work together for the good of her usefulness for me. It is a time of change a time of growing a time of drawing strength from me. Like I said that if your right hand offends you, cut it off. So any part of the body that is an entry for sickness or for disease cut it off so you can continue to live healthily for me. I can heal her, yes, right on the spot. I have kept her now for some time and you have seen my miracle working hand, but what if I now decide to heal a different way, through the doctors. Wouldn’t that make her more all-round in helping others? Wouldn’t she be able to comfort others more that are having the same operation? So go slow go prayerful. Let her weigh out all the pro’s and con’s and I will guide her and direct her step.

ENOUGH FLAGGELATION
Well I am not doing so well am I? My love I call you my love and I feel like the unjust steward. You have forgiven me for 100,000 capital sins, and then I demand that others pay me what little I think they owe me.
I must be extremely thickheaded and steeped in my own goodness to be that demanding. I know that I am a hypocrite, yet I pick up stones to throw at others. Please help me out of this. You never rewarded me like that. You never treated me like I treat others or there would be nothing left of me. You said to the woman go and sin no more, but I constantly seem to be sinning I constantly fall back in this old trap of sticking my foot in my mouth. I just can’t seem to get it past my thick head that with getting upset I take matters in my own hand and don’t allow you to work.

So Johan, now enough flagellating. Get up, you had a good evening feeding people and who cares what the messenger is like. It is the message that people partake of. Not the messenger and I am the message and if that comes out loud and clear then what is there to worry about. Okay you fell under your cross but hey so did I, I fell three times so it is not the end of the world. Apologize and go on with life. Keep loving and you will see that things will turn out okay but for now carry your cross bravely and worry not and be more faithful to come to me.

Yes, but next you got crucified and I don’t particularly look forward to that.

Neither did I, but wait till you get to the resurrection part that is amazing, beyond description and will send you into ecstasies – like it did me. So hold on.

A PRAYER

Hi my Lord, my heart is not so exuberant today, however because of your tremendous love for me I keep my head up and shout at the discouragement “my Lord wins I am no good, but my Lord is here working in me in spite of me” I shout “I love you Jesus” I want to shout it from the rooftops, however I feel like a muffled child. I don’t know who to talk to I don’t know what to do, so I do my good works, but I need you to show me. I am very desperate with knowing what you want me to do.

The day is drawing to its end, don’t let my life draw near to its end without me being able to be used by you my love I desire to witness. Oh Jesus, I need you so much more than anything in the World. Please help, you were faithful to give the message to whoever came your way. I feel like life is passing me by and soon I will have to face you and I feel ashamed for having done so little, so minuscule a part, so little difference in this world. Oh my love come and let me rest my head upon your shoulder and chest, how could I survive without you and your precious guidance. Come love me and strengthen me and give me joy and beauty once more and make my face to shine for you once again. Please do with me as you please whatever pleases you. I seek you my darling let not my life be snuffed out before its time, but to shine for you is my only desire. You know how I should shine and how I should be. Help me to be the best little daddy, the best little prayer warrior, the best little encourager and the best little diamante that you are polishing my love through which you can shine.

Ha, I feel lighter, I feel so much better now that I got this all of my heart. Make my heart a merry one a cheerful one. I guess Lord I wrote the above because I don’t want to have to face you and you ask me what did you do with your life? And all I can say, here is my one and only talent and I give it back to you, that would make me feel so bad as you have done so much for me. Then I would rather hideaway some place on a park bench or a little hide out place, than to see the disappointment on your face, but I know that you can change all that. I know that you will open your arms to me I have that much faith that you love me and will overlook my weaknesses. It is not that I deserve it but because of your mercy. You have filled me with joy once more. Thank you My cup is not half empty or half full, it is overflowing again. Thank You!